How to fail an interview

1 Feb 2016

*This post is written by guest blogger Swin Haur*

"I need a job!" is probably one of the most frustrating truths we have to bear with after some 15 years of schooling. Then again, getting a job probably is not that difficult, what's tough is to land the job the you really want. As one who has gone through tons of interviews (except not really) and failed most of them. I think I am probably qualified to teach you ways on how to fail an interview. 
After all, you never know when you will find them come in handy *evil wink*.

Now there are three stages to a job interview, pre-interview, during the interview itself as well as post-interview. And if you are wishing to fail an interview, there are a few things that you must actually do during the stage of pre-interview and during the interview itself.


1. Showing up with a sloppy look

Showing up with the wrong dress code, rumpled attire and unmated hair is definitely the pre-requisite to ruin your interview. As hard as others may be trying to impress the interviewers through the first impression, you need to make sure they feel disgusted by your outer appearance. PS.: It works well to get away from unwanted date as well.

2. Not doing any preparation beforehand

Interview is often scripted. First you prepare a list of high-potential questions. Then you prepare answers to each of them. And just before the interview, you will probably spend the night or even days before the interview to go through, or to some extent, memorize the standard answers. Well, don’t do anything if you want to fail your interview!

3. You're late

It pretty much sums up everything. Try to make the effort to be late (well, perhaps some don’t even need to try to be late). And even if you arrive on time, don’t show up on time!

During the Interview

1. Avoid the questions

Never ever answer what the interviewer(s) asked. If he asked about ‘A’, beat around the bushes and then answer ‘B’. Repeat this whole simple formula for every single question and I say you are up for a good headstart.

2. Be completely honest

Now let’s face it, most of the times, we might need to deliberately not bringing up something during the interview for your own good. Technically, we are not lying but just not mentioning. Surely, if you want the job, you would want to cover up as many weaknesses as possible. So in this case, be a good boy/girl and be total honest.

3. Be the Muter

Silence is gold, and this is exceptionally true during an interview. Instead of taking the approach of beating around the bushes or be completely honest, always give a one-worded answer and support it with a very soft, and almost inaudible voice.

4. Be rude/not professional

We all know it is not right to take phone calls, swirl around with the swivel chair, not looking in the eyes of your interviewer(s), not being attentive of what the interviewer(s) say, be offensive towards the interviewer(s) and many more. Well, you know what to do.

5. Oh My English!

A few local companies aside, you can almost not escape from using English in your daily routines. And because of that, your English proficiency is also being evaluated during the interview, with some companies placing higher emphasis for good English proficiency. 

Generally, a rule of thumb is that you just need decent English and not Queens’ English. Still, if you want to fail, screw up the correct pronunciation and MADES deliberate grammar MISTAKESES (you get the idea).

6. Be unrealistic

There might be a time during your interview where you talk about the package (compensation & benefits). Generally, if you did right what I mentioned above, you will not come to this point. After all, why waste the time discussing this when you are not keen to hire that person. Still, to be completely assure that you fail the interview, initiate this topic actively and make ridiculous demands (eg. 3 working days a week, unlimited annual leave and etc.).

                So there you go dear readers, 9 effective ways on how to fail your interview. All in all, I don’t actually hope that you will fail the interview of your dream job. Bottom-line is, it does not matter how good you are, sometimes you can just make a small mistake and poof, and there go your chances. So be sure to go through my list again and make sure you don’t do that, though you are welcomed to do so if you so choose to fail an interview.

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